Things are getting crazy for me again with work and stuff, so I might not be around too much. But I am still writing and receiving letters, and (occasionally) checking in on Facebook. If you need to get in touch with me, use the email address listed above.

That aside… How are you?

Through the LJ community, I also met my pen pal Brooke, whom some of you might know from the myLOL community. Several people joined the LJ community, and Letters of Love was off to a great start! I mean, I actually had pen pals, and my idea wasn’t flopping like a pancake!

It soon became clear, though, that although the LiveJournal environment was at the time my favorite place online, it was not the right place for Letters of Love. I decided to set up a MySpace account*, in the hopes that I could better reach out to LOL’s then-demographic**.

My instincts ended up being right again, and Letters of Love continued to grow with the help of MySpace. I continued to update the LJ account for a while, but ceased cross-posting and only posted important updates.

However, it soon became clear that, while the MySpace account was helping people connect with each other, we needed a central site where people could find information about Letters of Love and how they could get involved. I began developing a small website, and set up accounts on Twitter and Facebook for LOL.

I had no idea what it took to create a website for what is basically a nonprofit at the time, so the first stage was very, very experimental. I honestly didn’t know if it would do the trick…

*For an important update regarding our MySpace account, please see this announcement.

**When LOL first started, our demographic was young women ages 14-25. Now, LOL has pen pals and supporters of all ages and both male and female!

Did you miss the first part of the story? Read How Letters of Love Started: Part III!

The story continues next week in the third and final (for now) chapter!

Time to introduce myself and tell you a bit more about me – I’m Joe Hupp and I live in a fairly large regional centre in New South Wales, Australia, called Dubbo. I have had properly diagnosed anxiety for the last few years – but have suffered anxiety for much longer than that!

I am employed by the biggest employer in our town – it is fun and keeps me out of mischief!

More to come!

Joe

To Write Love On Her Arms? I thought to myself. Could it possibly be what it sounds like?

Being someone who has struggled with self-injury throughout my adolescence, it didn’t seem possible that TWLOHA could mean anything else. I had never heard of any organization who helped people who self-harm, though, so I tried not to get my hopes up as I clicked through to their website.

I quickly discovered that TWLOHA is a

…non-profit movement dedicated to presenting hope and finding help for people struggling with depression, addiction, self-injury and suicide. TWLOHA exists to encourage, inform, inspire and also to invest directly into treatment and recovery.

I felt unbelievable amazement at knowing that such an organization existed. Since I had struggled with depression and self-injury, I felt an overpowering urge to get involved somehow. Unfortunately, at the time, TWLOHA didn’t have a street team***. I was bummed, and I couldn’t think of any other way that I could do something like what they were doing: providing awareness of depression, and support to others living with it.

Still, I became obsessed with TWLOHA. I bought a tee shirt, told everyone who I thought would listen about them and what they were doing, and looked up different communities on LiveJournal to get in touch with other supporters and to see what they were doing to get involved.

While browsing one community, I stumbled upon a thread where one of the community members suggested that a few of them swap addresses and become pen pals.

Pen pals… Something clicked, and Letters of Love sprang into life. I had grown up writing letters to and receiving them from friends and family, and had always loved checking my mail to see if a letter had arrived. It had always given me something to look forward to, and writing them was just as fun as getting them. It just made perfect sense to take that simple concept and take it to a level where it could actually be therapeutic, in a way, for myself and others.

On February 13th, 2008, I set up a LiveJournal community and posted asking for a pen pal****.

Anyone who would like for me to write them a letter, please leave your name and address here. In turn, if you want to leave your address for someone else to write a letter, please make a separate post as I will be screening comments here for people’s privacy.

Along with your name and address, please write a little about yourself, such as your favorite color, any hobbies you might have, favorite musicians and movies, etc.

I will screen comments here for privacy. Feel free to add me on Lj or on the same username on Insanejournal, as well as my MySpace, myspace.com/delirious19th (just send me a message letting me know you’re from Letters of Love).

Good night, and have a good day tomorrow!

Elizabeth Kaylene

Honestly, I thought that the whole thing was probably too spontaneous and that no one would even be interested in snail mail, since, hello, we have email!

Obviously, I was wrong.

Tune in next week for Part II!

*Ironically enough, I don’t like Paramore because, to me, all of their songs sound the same beyond “Misery Business”!

**This page apparently no longer exists ):

***But they do now! (:

****Luckily, LJ had settings that allowed me to screen comments so that only I could see them, enabling people to post their addresses securely. Now, it is required for Letters of Love pen pals to email or private message each other their addresses.

Kind Over Matter reaches out through handmade gifts, sharing on their blog different ideas they’ve come across, things people have suggested to them, or things they have done themselves. Most notably, they have a freebie section of printable goodies that you can give to others or leave in random places to encourage others. Before leaving for work this morning, I printed out their Create Positive Change cards, which are for leaving in random places so that people will see them.

This isn’t necessarily a new idea, since I’ve seen several blogs and whole websites dedicated to leaving Post-its with positive messages around, but it’s different because these cards are ready to print and all you have to do is cut them out. I thought it would be cool to write a quick note on the back of them, even, saying something like, “If you’re having a bad day, you are not alone. Make a quick list of some things that make you happy, and your bad day might just turn around!”

Unfortunately, I didn’t have time this morning to cut the cards out, but they’re waiting for me at home, and I can’t wait to leave them for someone!

Please go check out Kind Over Matter when you get a chance, and share their site with your friends. I’m really grateful for their shout out, and it’s always a good idea to pay it forward.

Counting down the minutes until I can use my cards,
Elizabeth

Henry Scott Holland
1847-1918
Canon of St Paul ‘s Cathedral

All you have to do is comment and tell us your choice’s username, and tell us why you think she or he should be Pen Pal of the Month. In one week, we will move to the voting round.

The winner will be featured as August’s Pen Pal of the Month on our lettersoflove.net home page, as well as in the next issue of NewsLetters of Love.

So, myLOL friends… Let the nominations begin!

I also wanted to let you know that I’ve been popping in and out to check on things. Everyone say hi to Ayla, our newest member, bringing us up to exactly 50 members of myLOL! This is very exciting!

I hope all is well with each of you.

Take care. I’ll see you soon.

By Donald Davis

Intro to Psych

ACC Riverside Campus

Prof. Ron Brown

The United States has been a nation for less than two hundred fifty years. In that time we have gone through many changes. The Revolutionary War, the Civil War, the Gold Rush, the Industrial Era, the Great Depression, Civil Rights, airplanes, cars, weapons, science, medicine… and the list goes on.  In each era, our society embraced the technology that improved the quality of life.  In the last twenty years, technology has brought us cell phones, computers, mp3 players, digital cameras, file sharing, etc… In our daily lives, personal and public, technology has improved the way we complete our tasks and get our information. The first study I performed was to see if the way that polls are taken could be changed in the near future. The resulting poll answered the second part of the study. My second study is a two-part poll question. Are the key demographics, men and women ages 18-34, more or less socially aware with the increase of mass media and social networks?

In the last few years, social networking sites, such as Twitter, Facebook and You Tube has changed the way we interact. We gather information, create immediate stories and distribute the information in real time on many of these new platforms.  What used to take hours now takes minutes. An example is polling.  As of right now, pollsters for CNN and Gallup call registered voters on their home phones, or landline phones to complete their polls, which are then released the following day. Technology has advanced to the point where many Americans no longer have landlines and rely solely on mobile phones. This has created a large group that pollsters cannot reach. The White House has even created a Twitter account and Facebook page. Many websites now even ask for your phone number so you can receive updates. Pretty soon, I believe text messages will be used as a way for polling services to make even more immediate and accurate polls.

In my first study, I sent out a poll via text message, Twitter and Facebook. One hundred and one people responded via text message and one responded via Twitter. In doing this, I was able to reach out to many states, from New York to Hawaii. This also allowed me to reach out to all races, genders and religions. My study was random and also in a controlled setting. The drawback is that I only had a database of people whom I know and/or follow me on my social networking sites.

A definition found online for contextual psychology reads: “Contextual Psychology refers to the study of organisms (both human and non-human) interacting in and with a historical and current situational context. It is an approach based on contextualism, a philosophy in which any event is interpreted as an ongoing act inseparable from its current and historical context and in which a radically functional approach to truth and meaning is adopted.”

For many people, what they see, watch or hear is put in to context. In laymen’s terms, everything has meaning. In this new society, in many forums that didn’t exist twenty years ago, new media has no context. It is a say anything and do anything money grab for ratings, website hits, shock value and for attention. Nothing more. In radio, Howard Stern and Rush Limbaugh use opinions to antagonize their radio audience creating both positive and negative emotional responses. XM radio has given way for people to consume radio with no censorship. Cable television now includes shows like South Park and Family Guy that push the boundaries of what’s socially acceptable. Movies such as the Clerks, Freddy Got Fingered and Anchorman and TV shows like TMZ, Tosh.O and the Daily Show use pop culture to create cringe humor and observational comedy.

The Internet only adds to this phenomenon. It has given us instant access to everything. This generation has grown up with computers, and regardless of parental controls, parents cannot watch their kids every hour of every day. Internet memes are a common; videos and pictures go viral in minutes, many of which tasteless and poke fun at things that are considered socially irresponsible. Anything and everything can be found online. Want to see a picture of a bullfighter getting gored? Google it!

Want to find a NSFW (Not Safe For Work) widget for you smart phone, there’s an app for that. Now more than ever parents have to try harder to keep their kids away from such graphic images and away from new media. Kids can be exposed to murders, beheadings, pornography and other graphic images at the click of a button. It’s not only pay-for content sites, its blogs that show graphic stories, its mainstream media also jumping on the bandwagon, trying to be the first to report stories, regardless the content. Going as far to have the general public help them report on stories. CNN’s iReporters are an example. Everyone is trying to be the first to report the story. In this era, everything is a story.

All of this accessibility has created a generation that has become numb to whatever they come across. Nothing is shocking and everything goes. In my study, I sent two pictures via mms (multimedia messaging service) to my followers on Twitter, Facebook and via text message. I asked what their reaction was to each picture. One depicted a pop culture reference while the other referencing a social problem we face in our culture. The pictures sent were as follows, Picture 1 and Picture 2:

The Princess Diana picture is considered cringe humor, a very popular form of humor. It is passed through e-mail chains, text message chains, message boards and blogs. Stand-up comedians made this form of humor popular. This humor has made its way into television shows, movies and radio. Making fun of a famous person’s death was once considered to be of limits. The idea of empathy is thrown out the window when using cringe humor and the people who use it do not show empathy for the dead. That is the joke. There is also no empathy for the handicapped, children, and natural disasters. Cringe humor doesn’t just cross the line; it provokes the consumer for an emotional response.

The second picture depicting rape is also considered a tasteless joke as it pokes fun at a real issue that many people deal with in our country. Cartoons and videos that make light of subjects such as rape, suicide, abortion, cancer, AIDS, sexual preference and religions are also easily found. Many sent by emails, text messages, put in blogs, talked about on radio, used in sitcoms, all meant to push the limits of the general public’s perceptions and purposely antagonizing those who feel strongly about those issues. It can be said it is just observational humor, but many people would argue that dialogue about those subjects should be addressed in a serious and/or educational environment.

My theory is that in our new generation, we have no context to anything we look at. With no context, there are no rules. A breakdown of my experiment statistics can be found on the last page. What I did was separate the poll into males and females ages 18-34 (Generation X and Generation Z), considered the key demographic for advertisers. Advertising revenue is how mass media is able to continue to distribute content. I also used males and females ages 35-60 (Generation X and Baby Boomers) for my study. The previous generation did not have new media. They grew up with basic cable and newspapers, 8 tracks and Walkman’s.  I broke down the results in to positive responses (such as finding humor in each picture) and negative responses (finding the pictures repulsive). I calculated the overall responses, and then further broke down the results by age group and gender.

My results were as follows: Of those who found the pictures funny, most answers that were given were in one word responses or short sentence fragments. Of those who disliked the picture, many responded with questions of morality, finding no humor in death and/or rape. Many stating that there are certain subjects off limits

As I expected, 18-34 years old were not as disturbed by the photos as 34-60 years old. I think this points to the trend of media using anything for shock value. Again, our generation is numb. Even females in the key demo found a joke about rape funny. Rape is anything but funny, and I’m sure they don’t believe it’s okay, but jokes about it are okay. The context is taken as a joke and not an opportunity for social commentary. Cringe humor which was once shocking, has now become a habituation response for this group. The group ages 35-60 put the rape joke in to context of what rape actually is.  Using their emotional response to engage in social commentary. They seem to have perspective and looked at the picture subjectively, something the other group did not do. They continue to have a negative unconditioned response to that type of humor, which is found everywhere.

Many responses to the study were sent back via text. Positive responses included: “Oh that’s a good one“, Oh how cute”, “LMAO, Nice”, “That is funny shit”, “Ha”,  “Awww, pretty adorable”,  “I laughed”, “Haha That’s funny”,  “This is good”,  “Haha that’s great”,  “Ur so funny”,  “I found it fairly funny actually”,  “Wow, awesome, just awesome”, “ROTFLMFAO”,  “Idk where you got these, but I’m glad you did”, “Lol”, “The Princess Diana one is amusing once it sinks in”.

Negative responses included: “That’s sick, I guess I’m the only one with a sense of morals, but it’s kinda funny in a sick way”,  “Another tasteless one”,  “That’s messed up”,  “Disgust and a growing feeling of nausea in my stomach, that’s not funny at all, and the second one only furthered my feeling of disgust”, “The Princess Diana one is messed up, the other one is hilarious”, “WTF, and laugh laugh”, “Weirded out, confused and disgusting”, “Sick, rape like other sexual assaults is a serious subject. Once you offend the audience you cannot get them back. Once you ring that bell, it cannot be undone. Think”, “It is so easy to joke and make fun of the dead or anyone who can’t defend themselves. When did we stop respecting ourselves by making fun of others”, “Disgusted”, “Negative”, “ The grape one was funny but it’s something that shouldn’t be a joke, the Princess Diana one was dumb to me, it wasn’t funny or anything”, “Shock at the first one, the second one is cute”, “They’re both terrible”, “My reaction is not good, I don’t like those things”,  “My reaction is WTF”, “That’s Horrible”, “Ennui for the Princess Diana one, disdain for the stick figure because I though the joke was lame.”

So the question remains. With media out there that is emotionally charged, how far is too far? Are stand-up comics exempt? Would these pictures be okay if a comic used it in a routine? If it were used in a movie, would we pass it off as a tasteless joke in a tasteless movie? Where is the line in the sand? Everything in society is moving fast, faster than we can catch up. Computers, cell phones, cars, pharmaceutical’s, energy…. etc.  Social issues are also moving as fast as this technology. Once we make progress though, rarely do we look back. We have put ourselves out there; everything we do in social settings is now subject to scrutiny as nothing is private anymore. Just about everything has a digital record. This will transcend history, as future generations will have more access that we could ever imagine. What if we had accurate records, audio and video of every decision and speech that Presidents have given? Our generation has made it to where two hundred years from now, State of the Union addresses, natural disasters, sports records, newspaper columns…all of these will be stored in different mediums, available for all to see. Our action or inaction will be scrutinized in the history books for generations to come.

I think what this experiment shows is that all of this technology, all of this social networking and everything being available at the click of a button is tearing at the very fabric of our society. There is nothing sacred anymore, nothing. We use the 1^st Amendment as a crutch to offensive material. Words can be seen as loaded weapons, and our generation is taking aim at anything and everything. We’re going out guns blazing, not caring who gets in our way. It’s our right, so says the 1^st Amendment. I don’t blame older generations for their frustration with ours. They say we don’t understand the repercussion of our actions. Their generation used handshakes closed business deals. Their parents had a direct impact on their children’s lives, teaching morals, values, respect and integrity passed down through family tradition. New media is infringing on these traditions. Children have access. Parents work more, leaving different media forums as an open thread to shaping children’s thoughts. Access can teach children, but too much access can be detrimental to the growth of a child.

To be completely transparent, I found those jokes funny; I am absolutely a part of the social and technology generation. I don’t grasp repercussions because I know what I believe in and don’t believe in. I am part of the generation whose actions don’t necessarily reflect what we truly feel. I enjoy making light of everything, no matter how serious it is. Having seen truly serious situations, it’s hard for me to take things too seriously. I enjoy the type of radio, TV and movies that aren’t serious, that are self-deprecating that use controversial rhetoric to make social commentary. My generation agrees with me. The numbers prove it. Provocative media draws numbers in the key demographic. The highest rated websites, movies, radio shows, music are geared toward this new generation. We are the driving force behind this phenomenon and it’s only picking up steam.

The thing is, we do not set a good example for generations behind us. We put things out through many forms of media that cannot be taken back, that are out there forever for anybody to see. Every keystroke we publish is a historical record. Even if we contribute to society in a positive manner in the public forum, our personal indiscretions highlighted on our social networking pages have become a part of our public life, blurring the lines of how we are perceived. What we believe versus what we are perceived to believe at times cannot be separated. Contextual psychology is based on ongoing acts being inseparable. We separate them and don’t see the downside to what we are doing. All we know is that we have a total access card to use open threads as we please.

The good news is that there are still people of all ages in my study who have a keen awareness on the social impact on such humor. They understand the intention of the joke, but they find it offensive. My study was sent to people I know, people who know how I am. Text messages are personal form of contact, and it could have been very easy to blow off the text as a bad joke. Many I’m sure did, and they now have a different perception of me. Those who did respond, responded not with outrage, but with educated questions to why I would think it is okay to share such filth. They responded with insightful thoughts as to why such jokes are not okay. I think it speaks to the private life/public life debate. It’s not that they do not have a sense of humor, or that they are uptight, it’s that they have the moral fabric and they talk the talk and walk the walk. I applaud them for standing up for what they believe. I think we need to respect anyone who s willing to engage in social commentary without reading talking points.

There were many flaws in my research and experiment. First, I have no formal training in the proper way to run an experiment. I thought I had the right idea and technology to perform my study. It turns out that I made a mistake in sending my text messages. I attempted to send my text out at 8pm CST. Many overnight polls are conducted between the hours of 6pm-9pm. I thought my time-line would be the perfect way to test my theory on polls being able to be taken via text message.  I still believe that it will be able to happen, but one person trying to send a message to over 100 people is not the way to do it. I think the problem arose because the pictures I attached were over 1mb. My carrier slowly sent out the messages. Many people did not receive the message in the time-line I thought they would. Some people did not receive the message until midnight local time. As you can imagine, many people did not respond to the poll because of how late it was received. However, they did respond the next day upset that their phone went off while they were asleep.

To make matters worse, I believe I made a mistake in sending the messages, and the messages were re-sent throughout the night. So people that responded to the poll promptly also received the poll again, continuously throughout the night. So I also received messages the next day of people very upset. So even though I received the data necessary to complete my study, people were upset and disenchanted with me, even though I had the best intentions. I believe if I had a different thesis, one that did not include attachments to the text messages, that the problems I came across could have been avoided.

All things considered, I think that I was able to put a psychological experiment out into the field. I knew that what I was doing was provocative and was going to garner strong emotional responses. I was surprised by many responses. Many people I thought would be offended found the images funny, while people I thought for sure understand the context, were not in the least amused. I think it is important to create dialogue, especially with issues social issues, and dialogue was created, Mass media and technology has improved our lives in many ways, but social awareness has been lost in the shuffle. “All progress is precarious, and the solution of one problem brings us face to face with another problem” – Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.

The Statistics for the poll are as followed.

(Picture1/Picture2)

Male

Positive Response

Age 18-34                  10/11

Age 35-55                    6/5

Negative response

Age 18-34                    2/1

Age 35-55                    1/2

No Response

Age 18-34                    12

Age 35-55                    8

Female

Positive Response

Age 18-34                  9/8

Age 35-55                  2/1

Negative Response

Age 18-34                 12/13

Age 35-55                 5/6

No Response

Age 18-34                 33

Age 35-55                 2

102 people were polled.  47 people responded. That is a 46% poll rate. Overall, 57% of the respondents had a positive reaction to picture 1 while 43% had a negative reaction. Of the same respondents, 53% had a positive reaction to picture 2 while 47% had a negative reaction.

The break down by gender and age group is as follows:

Of the 24 males ages 18-34 that were polled, 12 responded. Of the 12 that responded, 83% had a positive response to picture 1 while 17% had a negative response. The same group had a 92% positive reaction to picture 2, while 8% had a negative response.

Of the 15 males ages 35-60, that were polled, 7 responded. Of the 7 that responded, 85% had a positive reaction to picture 1 while 15% had a negative reaction. The same group had a 71% positive reaction to picture 2 while 29% had a negative reaction.

Of the 54 females ages 18-34 that were polled, 21 responded. Of those 21, 42% had a positive reaction to picture 1 while 58% had a negative response. The same group had a 38% positive response to picture 2 while 62% had a negative response.

Of the 9 females ages 35-60 that were polled, 7 responded. Of those 7, 28% had a positive reaction while 72% had a negative reaction. The same group had an 11% positive reaction to picture 2 while 89% had a negative reaction.

]]> http://my.lettersoflove.net/blog/2010/07/11/wherearewegoing/feed/ 5 http://my.lettersoflove.net/blog/2010/07/09/family-emergency/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=family-emergency http://my.lettersoflove.net/blog/2010/07/09/family-emergency/#comments Sat, 10 Jul 2010 03:51:12 +0000 Elizabeth Kaylene http://my.lettersoflove.net/?p=1404 Due to a family emergency, I won’t be online much and I’m not sure when I’ll be able to come back to the internet. I’ll be back soon; I just don’t know when.

Take care, everyone.

Pen pals: I’ll try to write you as soon as I can.